it has been two months since i last posted something here. my second year is finally over (despite the fact that i may not pass certain modules. ha), but it feels strange. no, it feels unreal.

without the load of work, i seem a bit more empty. i'm actually still getting used to not having something to do every second.

two months certainly wasn't a long time, but my priorities have changed dramatically. perhaps that's why i've given up another shot at a relationship, and life seems to resume like that guy never existed.

i do wonder how long it'll take before i break down and decide to have a guy around for the sake of having one. someday, i'll persist no more and give up waiting for the right person. who is the right one anyway? maybe he has already passed by and left without a trace.

i do think that i'm still young and hope might still be lingering in some obscure corner, but in some ways i feel i've gotten too old. i'm only turning 19 and yet i'm well weary of life.

if i would learn to trust, i'll probably be able to make things easier on myself. but i have, just that i know only to trust in how everything fails eventually, that people will disappoint. after 19 years, my most tangible lesson is the undeniable fact that everyone exists in this world alone.

love and companionship seems to be secondary.

I blogged @ 11:22 PM